Social media overload, contentment within chaos, and a short book review
Life is passing by me.
Endless scrolling… not enough living…
No matter how much I try to slow time down and savour its tiny moments, it doesn't comply. Regardless, my wishful mind has convinced its logical counterpart that it might slow down if I try hard enough. As an attempt to console it, the latter has decided to curb the urge to scroll endlessly. Resign from passive online spectatorship to indulge in actively living in the moment. Fair enough, I thought, as I entered Day 6 of limited social media overload.
This is probably the 2nd time I’ve attempted it this year. I usually give up or forget about it around the one week mark, but as always I am hopeful. One week of no mindless scrolling is better than no weeks at all. It's not really a failure even if I quit midway. It gives my brain that much more time to focus on the things that matter at least for a few days. Or at best be at ease.
Getting comfortable with a mess of emotions..
A whirlwind of emotions continues.. I am not going to do anything to manoeuvre it. Letting myself completely feel everything is the best course of action. Life is about to change and I am convincing my inner critic that it’s absolutely normal to feel fragile. The more I try to put on a brave face the more baggage to bear in the next phase of my journey.
I am not entirely comfortable with fragility. There is a fear that thoughts may spiral uncontrollably. And the fear awakens the inner critic. I am getting increasingly aware of this cycle, and settling with the idea of not controlling any of it. Of letting myself handle my emotions as and when it arises. Constantly reminding myself that all of it is justified. Simply because it exists. I don't need to define or rationalise it. Instead be aware of it and understand what it tries to signal.
Everyday is different, some days are easy and others tricky. But I am strong enough to be fragile. I persevere to remind myself of that.
Fingersmith by Sarah Waters - a review
The good news is that I am over my reading slump! Thank Goodness! And Sarah Waters! She has snatched me out of it again! This time with her novel Fingersmith. No phones means more reading. Every time I feel the urge to scroll I read a page or two. What a brilliant read!
In essence, Fingersmith revolves around the lives of two women who cross their paths in unusual circumstances. At the core it's a slow burn thriller filled with suspicion, fraud and a whole lot of lies. Set in Victorian Britain, the historical accuracy and atmosphere characterised by Sarah Waters is immaculate (as always). Like I said, it is a slow burn and simmers for a long time. It’s when you almost give up on the suspense and immerse in the mundanity, that she shakes you up with a twist. A drastic change of events and pace that leaves you stunned! There are some real jaw-dropping moments that will make you gasp. Safe to say I am hooked!
